Whether we like to acknowledge this or not. Whether it is politically correct to say or not - it is true. And some of us will recognise it immediately. And for direct purpose I am speaking here to women.
It begins at school. Whilst we are all in that tender stage of starting to unfurl. Such an early precious stage of life should never be handed over to careless and oft at times mean travellers of life - that being 'friends'. It is a time we are all trying to feel into our skin. Trying to bravely open and find a way to belong. Trying to connect. Trying to find our own way and yet so swayed by the strongest current that is flowing around us.
Amongst this time, we have the beginning of a 'class system' that speaks of greater and lesser. That swells with beautiful or not. That revolves around esteem and money as opposed to those with little. The have's and have not's. It is a time that we realise that we fit into the version of someone else's 'perfect' box or not, and that this is the way of life.
I recall it vividly. The popular girl, would always be surrounded by a bevy of much needed adoring fans. None of which she considers her equal. There is one or two sub standard seconds, who are attractive enough, perhaps intelligent enough that they may appear to be her 'best friend', although this title is really only loosely formed to make way at any time as needed for a next best friend. The rest of the girls, dare I say it, perhaps are chubby, or not as attractive in her eyes, yet doting. They form the crowd. They are the mass numbers that create the impact for what seems to be 'control'.
Now I may not have described your childhood scene but I am certain you know of this setting. And it can be moved around to many various groups, but always offering up the very same group ranking of best ... and then not so.... and then nothing. Be it the intelligent nerdy group, always having the best brain, then the next best, down to the 'I want to be nerdy as I don't fit in anywhere else.' To the popular group - to the music crowd etc etc.
My point here is this. We learn from a young age to form friendships and connections based on a mindset of inequality. In amongst our time of becoming, in our own insecurity, in our own attempt to find our own love and esteem and confidence, it is often done through the use of belittling others. If not belittling to them, within our own minds, seeing them as far less than ourselves. At the very least creating a ladder of worth within our own mindset that speaks of greater and lesser.
I have come to know this mindset both from the Queen perspective and the Bee perspective. The one who to this day continues to think, 'oh I could never', with the head bowed down - to the one who says 'well of course I can', with the flick of hair to show the air of confidence.
As we get older, I see today, that this system and class still exists. That often women are surrounding themselves with those they feel are less than them in order for them to feel and appear greater.
There is little strength in this. There is little to deem successful in this. This is pure ego.
As I see a turn of tides with the movement of the feminine energy and the base of empowering ourselves and inspiring those around us to become, it is an important mind shift that needs to occur for us to truly be able to grasp any form of equality.
No minority group can ever truly stand in its strength when it itself is not a united force.
We cannot be asking for equality when we continue to consider all amongst us not equal.
There is much greater strength to be found, and power to be discovered in standing as equals with those you stand with. It takes a whole new ball game to be able to stand next to someone and share the spot light, to embrace all they are, to accept and love them for their greatness, to empower their journey, to learn from each other, than to surround ourselves with any one we would consider less than who we are.
YES. You are right. I was hoping you would say within your mind, NO ONE is greater or lessor than you. That is my point.
That never has anyone been greater or lessor than you or I. That this idea was simply a way of a self absorbed teenager trying to create something of themselves through the use of others. But the truth of this, is that we come of age, mature, gain esteem, confidence, self love, self acceptance. All of this settles within us and I hope that we would find a way to stand amongst each other as equals.
That by now we have discovered that the old mindset was always one of denial, of our own self really. That in thinking greater or lessor of anyone is merely our own self perception.
That we have the chance to now, stand amongst powerful, strong, educated, intelligent, kind, compassionate, clever, brilliant, empowered, wonderful women. And that we will find within ourselves greater strength in our own being standing alongside her rather than thinking less of her.
That the power we will hold in our own self being this very woman, and asking others to stand alongside us as this woman, takes far greater courage and strength than anything else. That to applaud another, embrace another, support another and to nurture another, is truly the greatest compassion of real feminine soul that we can gift each other.
That the times of seeing anyone as lessor than our own self have passed to seeking to actually grabbing each others hands and pulling us up so that we can stand alongside each other. That the more we do this we empower our own being, that we become greater with each woman alongside us equally. That it is through this nurtured sisterhood that we actually will prevail to holding a firm ground of solidarity, for we will not be a minority anymore.
That in rising and standing equally and seeking for every woman to be able to stand alongside each other, we create a mass of intense ability and intention that enables us all to be heard and seen as vital and empowered beings because of our own acceptance. That rather than looking around when we rise and adoring the view on our own that we actively look for those around us to join us.
That this year we seek to connect wholly and fully to each other, grasp hands, cling to one another and that should one begin to falter we all place a hand to steady them.
That this year we support the rise of each and everyone of us through our own empowered connection to our own self.
May you rise with me alongside you!